A conversation with my Kizzee
I just recently watched 'Dil bechara' and some of its scenes are stucked in my mind. Especially when kizee asks that how can one live happily after one's loved ones death. That's a million dollar question.
So I invented a conversation inside my head see if it's helpful 🌺 I thought to keep it small but It's stretched a bit long automatically 😅
CHAPTER I
It was falling Autumn season, the sun had been almost set. I (Zee) and my Kizzee were on the clear bridge walking slowly. I was kept nudging her because kizzee had appeared quiet and I was asking her random questions for fun. Suddenly kizee stopped and happened to lean on the bridge relling looking at the river and it seemed that she becomes lost in some thoughts. "What happened kizzee" I asked.
"Zee, how are you going to live happily after my death? How mumma and papa going to live? You won't be able to live happily, the hope of life also dies with the death of one's loved one" She uttered desolately.
"How did this thought came into your mind?" I said.
"Zee, the thought of being separated from you haunts me so badly every now and then. I know one day we're going to be apart forever and we will never meet again. We have lived some great moments together but I don't know for how long I'm going be be with you. The fear of death scares me" She said in a low voice.
"Well I'll live happy don't worry about me, let me first sing a song for you." I said with a half smile
I tried to change the topic and she showed a fake sign of relief over her face because she had also known that I didn't have the answer of her question.
But that incident forced me to seriously look for the authentic answer of her question. I knew her concern was genuine and merely a positive statement won't going to eradicate her death worries. I had to find the one true answer.
I met lots of people and tried to know the answer but I realised no one gave me a satisfactory answer. Some sounded really pessimistic, while other seemed so irrational.
One evening I was reclining on the sand at my favourite south riverside disappointed since I had no answer for kizzee's question. I knew the fear of death, the fear of being separated from me and her loved ones was making her life joyless and this in return was making me depressed too. I was looking on the drowning sun and was thinking that as the sun sets, one day the story of kizee and Me will also going to set down.
As I was caressing my hand on the sand, I sensed something uncomfortable on the corner of my palm. I noticed that there was an ant that was trying to drag a dead spider and she was constantly bumping into my palm untill I held my hand up. As I raised my hand she started moving again on her path on the prolonged bank. I thought what makes her so determined at her work.
"She is so small, she has a little life, then what makes her so steadfast. Her hope cannot be based on mere assumptions, she must knew her purpose of Life that's why she's so patiently doing her work." I thought.
CHAPTER II
I found a clue from that ant I thought why shouldn't I ask my queries from the one who has created me. The one who taught this ant how to live must also have something to tell me. The one who has given me life would definitely be able to give me a reasonable answer of my questions.
"O Allah can you please tell me that Can anyone live happily after his/her loved one's death?" I asked looking at the sky.
Startlingly my eyes fell and I drowsed for some moments. When I got up it'd been falling chilly night. I hurriedly taken the path of my home. In the way to my home I was excited and nervous because when I had slept on the riverbank I had seen a dream, unfortunately I didn't remember anything of the dream. I don't know how but in the subconscious mind I just had this thought that I should read the Qur'an. My dream had something to do with that thought. As I reached home I hastened to check the Qur'an. I had never read it before but in arabic only to escape my father's rebuke in childhood. First time I was reading the Qur'an in my language. I felt like God was speaking to me directly. It was not less than a miracle to me that the questions that I'd been asking for so long had finally been answered by the God.
Each verse was exactly hitting my heart and I continued to read until I fell asleep, when I woke up the sun had been risen. I hastely called kizzee to meet me at the north riverside. It was kizzee's favourite location. My favourite was South riverside and her favourite was north riverside and why this I'll tell you some other day.
"Hi kizzee," I greeted her gently with a full face smile.
"Hello Zee" she also replied with smile to complement.
"You seems very joyous today, what's the matter" she asked curiously.
"Why shouldn't I appear Joyous when I knew with conviction that we're going to be together forever!! And I mean it literally" I exclaimed. "Yes you and me are going to live together always, not even death can separate us"
"Kizzee, did you remembered that you asked me a question that how am I going to live happily after your death." I said tenderly.
"Yes, but I don't want to talk about that matter for it is depressing" She said worriedly.
I held her hand and we sat on the nearby bench.
"I looked for the answer everywhere and I finally reached to the conclusion that our life is based on our beliefs. How we think of particular things depends on our beliefs. As a social being we acquire beliefs consciously and unconsciously from our parents, our society and culture. Some of them happens to be right and some of them happens to be wrong." She was listening me patiently because most of the time she used to be serious and I used to do funky activities to cheer her up but after a long time I was talking to her seriously.
"I asked many people about the death and what happens after it? Is life meaningless? What's the point of living this pitiful life if we had no purpose? Even smallest atom has a lifetime of more than billion years so how can humans being supposed to have an existence of only approx 100 years? And many more alike."
"I encountered with different answers but none satisfied me. Then one day I was sitting on the south riverside alone and an intuition had hit me when I saw an ant and I thought why shouldn't I put my questions before the God directly." I continued to speak. Then I relate to her what happened to me that evening on the riverside." I said.
CHAPTER III
"I realised that people answered me nothing but their beliefs, and most of them were seemed to be merely based upon assumptions or as a luggage of their ancestors. I realised that the only way to come to the right answer is to directly ask the God. Your grandma used to narrate the fable 'Ek tha Raja Ek thi Rani Dono Mar gaye khatam Kahani' that was wrong kahani. In reality kahani doesn't end with death rather it proceeds into a new dimension."
"Death is not the end, it's just a junction between this life and the eternal afterlife. I know the fear of death is natural but we shouldn't be afrait unnecessarily because death inevitable and it's a natural phenomenon. We're not going to become dust after death. Indeed our body will but not our soul and indeed God will re-create our body."
"God says [Does man think that We will not assemble his bones? Yes indeed We are Able to reconstruct his fingertips] {Qur'an 75:4}"
"On Resurrection Day Allah will reconstruct our bodies to the smallest detail even our unique fingerprints. So the belief that everything ends after death is false."
"And don't worry you're not going to be reincarnate as a cow, ant, plant or even as another human being.You're not going to get into any process of birth and death again and again for no one wants to struggle again and again."
"Death is only once and then there's resurrection and then there's everlasting life. You will not be able to return to this world after death."
"God says [They will not taste death therein except the first death(death of this world), and He will have protected them from the punishment of Hellfire. As bounty from your Lord. That is what is the great attainment] {Qur'an 44:56,57}"
"You'll be raised in your own identity i.e. kizzee not in this world but on the resurrection day. And don't worry you're not going to miss me forever because Allah will bring us together again if we both happens to be righteous. He'll again make us meet as he did in this world and in our this very same identity i.e you'll be same kizzee and I will be same Zee."
"God says [Gardens of perpetual residence; they will enter them with whoever were righteous among their fathers, their spouses and their descendants. And the angels will enter upon them from every gate, (saying):’Peace be upon you for what you patiently endured. And excellent is the final home] {Quran, 13:23-24}"
"It means we'll not be alone in paradise but we'll able to meet our loved ones. Hey are you really listening to me or not" I said by tapping her head, "You haven't even asked what shall we do to be together always" I said.
"Yes I am listening, you are appearing enlivened so I didn't wanted to break your flow" she said cutely
CHAPTER IV
"Okay then let me tell you we literally don't need to do anything significant to be together always. It's natural, God promised a wonderful everlasting heavenly life if we just live happily and do good deeds and leave things which are bad. And one of such bad thing is that to consider any other person as God because if we do that then we will become confuse what's right and what's wrong. As we used to be ignorant before the riverside incident and were living our life miserably and with fear. It is God who guided us so it's our duty to seek God's advice lest we become ignorant again." I explained and she nodded her head.
"God says [ And your Lord has decreed that you not worship except Him, and to parents, good treatment. Whether one or both of them reach old age (while) with you, say not to them (so much as), "uff," and do not repel them but speak to them a noble word.] {Qur'an 17:23}"
"We all humans are travellers, passing from different stages of our existence. Hey I just remembered an allegory. Imagine we're on a station waiting for train. Someone's train comes early and someone's later. But our destination is same i.e. the eternal afterlife. Once we depart from this world's station then there's no return in any case. The two trains arrive at this station, one train goes to hell and the other goes to heaven and we're forced to board on one train. We are free to chose whatever train we wish for if we live our life righteously as God commands as prophet peace be upon him advised then our eternal destination is heaven. And if we chose the path of evil then the heavenly train is merely a wish."
"Now we have known that there's no eternal separation but a temporary. I know it's natural that if I went earlier then you'll miss me and vice versa. So let's make some promise. Everytime you miss me you will try to save a life because saving the life a single soul is like saving the entire mankind."
"God says [ Because of that, We decreed upon the Children of Israel that whoever kills a soul unless for a soul or for corruption [done] in the land - it is as if he had slain mankind entirely. And whoever saves one - it is as if he had saved mankind entirely. And our messengers had certainly come to them with clear proofs. Then indeed many of them, [even] after that, throughout the land, were transgressors.] {Qur'an 5:32}"
"And if you don't find yourself in a position where you can save someone's life then atleast try to make the life of other people better and take care of an orphan, wayfarer, or kins." I said hopefully.
"God says [They ask you what (things) they should spend, Say, "Whatever charity you spend is for parents and nearest kin, and orphans, and the indigent, and the wayfarer; and whatever charity you perform, then surely Allah is Ever-Knowing of it.] {Qur'an 2:215}"
"And especially orphans as prophet Muhammad PBUH has said ["I and the one who looks after an orphan will be like this in Paradise,” showing his middle and index fingers and separating them.] {Sahih al-Bukhari}"
"The meaning of this saying is the person who sponsors the orphans worldly concerns will occupy a high position in the heaven close to the position of the Prophet peace be upon him" I said
As I was speaking continuously, she was just listening silently and I could easily noticed her face being relaxed. I had to say more but I thought to tell some other day.
"Zee, you are truly a blessing to me. You saved me from the downcast depression. You went too far to make me happy" she said contentedly. "You mentioned about beliefs of society. That's really fascinating idea, I used to thought if I obey God then my life will get too restrained and restricted. You changed my belief. You rightly made me realise that our beliefs comes from others and all of them are not true, in order to live happily and carefree we must search the right one." She added.
"Yes God created each and every individual whether men or women with freedom of choice to live our own life. But the society and culture sometimes try to block and hinder our life"
"They Sometimes bound us the name of religion or caste. Sometimes in the name of Gender expectations that you're a girl you're not allowed to chose a spouse or you are not allowed to do this and that etc. Anyway let's Stop thinking about them for now, just enjoy this beautiful weather I think it's going to rain. Now live happily and carefree for God will never let us apart." I said.
Soon it started drizzling and we went to the nearby street pakoda shop. It was the first time she didn't shown annoyance to eat from the street shop. Undoubtedly, that day her happiness were visible through her radiant eyes.
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